Change of Events.

So. Funny thing about acting all bad ass and telling my teeth to go screw?

Guess they heard me and thought I was cute. Fastforward to the next day. THE WORSE EFFING PAIN I HAVE EVER FELT. If I had to liken it to anything else, I'd think Kelly Rippa naturally birthing Budha. Painting a picture? So I wake up and beg my father to drive me to the surgeon. Apparently, I no longer have dental insurance either due to the impossibility that I will ever have dental issues or because I'm a 22 year old scumbag that isn't in college/doesn't have an office job. I'm sitting in the waiting room, holding my face, cursing like a bachelor party of truckers, when I find this out. A grand, and one pissed off father later, two little bastards are out of my mouth and my face looks like a picasso painting from all the novacane.

OH NO. Fun don't stop, kids.

I end up having an infection. Remember those kick-your-ass strength antibiotics? Yeah. Didn't do shit.

Let's fast forward to a few days, and a bottle of Hydrocodone later, here I am. Stomach hurts. Face hurts. Ego hurts. Taking a pint to the head on cinco de mayo was the plan. The pint being filled with rainbow sherbert instead of corona is what happened. FML. Just wanted to explain my slight hiatus.

Right now my face looks like I have a grapefruit in my cheek, it's 2 am, I have a painkiller with my name on it, and you kiddies will have to come visit me tomorrow for more. I'll miss you too.

Nightie night, bitches.

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