Now that the awkward "Hey I'm a diabetic" shpeal is over, let's go over some other key points.
- I have a very brash, sarcastic, sometimes offensive sense of humor.
- I'm not blogging to make my mortgage payments,
so feel free to navigate away from the page if you feel compelled to do so.
- I have Colitis.
- I will rant about things including but not limited to:
cramps,
bowl movements,
foods that help or worsen the aforementioned topics,
and my general disdain for colonoscopies.
- I have ADD. Really bad ADD.
- Don't try to make sense of anything I write.
- Freud couldn't analyze the shit in my head.
- I have recently become a business owner.
- My main goal is to make pastries and cakes that are pretty, delicious, and are available in sugar-free versions that don't taste like the bottom of a boot.
- I've had some pretty horrific experiences working for people and it's just not my bag, baby.
- So far I have a kitchenaid, some kick ass recipes, and enough determination to make Donald Trump blush.
- I have dated the scum of the Earth. Trust me. I have scorned and been scorned.
- This blog will also include plenty, PLENTY, of shit talking/dirty snippets of my ever-expanding, shit-show of a "love" life.
You've been warned.
I do hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoy talking about myself.
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